Thursday, October 31, 2013

The Monster Squad is Made of Awesome

In celebration of today, Halloween, one of the most ridiculous yet hilarious of holidays, I thought I'd share my love for the 1987 camp classic The Monster Squad.

I discovered this gem several years ago, and it quickly became one of my favorite October "scary movies. In case you're not familiar:

Basically Dracula sets out to find all of his badie friends who converge on one small town in particular.  A group of teens (and pre-teens) discover his plot to use Frankenstein, Creature from the Black Lagoon, Wolfman, and the Mummy to take over the world.  They form a club known as The Monster Squad to stop the ancient vampire in his tracks.

I thought I'd compile a list of 5 reasons why The Monster Squad is made of awesome and you should absolutely check it out at your earliest convenience:

  1. It's got all of the stereotypes: mean teachers that resemble their pets, a scary neighbor who turns out to be more helpful than mean, the need for a virgin to save the world, the bad boy, the ditzy blonde, the best friends, the annoying sibling, and, of course, the unpopular kid who ends up totally kicking butt.
  2. It's got killer dialogue and one liners (which I realize only works if you've seen the movie or their said out loud with sarcasm and enthusiasm :)  Come find me.  I'll be happy to re-enact these precious moments) :
    • Rudy: [after defeating the mummy] See you later, Band-Aid Breath!
    • Horace: [after kicking the wolfman] Wolfman's got nards!
    • Patrick: [after having the "virgin" read the spell to stop the monsters] You're not a virgin? Patrick's sister [shakes her head] No?  What do you mean no? Patrick's sister: Well, Steve...but he doesn't count.  Patrick: DOESN'T COUNT!
  3. It's got all the best monsters.  All of them.  In really cheesy costumes.
  4. Sean, The Monster Squad president of sorts of, can sit on his roof and watch a drive in movie with binoculars.  Kind of my dream.  A few months after I bought my house, I saw an ad for an apartment available at a local drive-in theater.  You would live above the concession stand.  Oh dear goodness that would have been awesome.
  5. Movies made in the 1980s are, basically, by definition, made of awesome.  No really.  Think about it. Big hair, stonewashed jeans, and the repeated use of the word "bogus." The 80s gave us John Hughes, Back to the Future, TheGhostbusters, and the 1985 Michael Schultz's classic The Last Dragon.  It doesn't get better than the 80s.
So there you go.  I dare you to argue the awesomeness of this masterpiece with me.  If you do get yourhands on it, please oh please let me know what you think!

Happy Halloween!

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